To my fans:
I haven't posted anything about toilets in almost three years. Why not? Because life is long and difficult and full of things that easily surpass blogging in importance. Does that mean I wasn't out in the world fixing toilets? Of course not. (Are you kidding?)
Some men are born to lead. Others, to follow. I am here to fix toilets, and I know this because wherever I go in this world, there is a toilet awaiting my attentions.
Here's the toilet in my apartment, now making its first appearance on the Internet. I woke up on Saturday last to find that my flapper chain was broken. I wasn't even able to leave the house that morning before needing to plunge my hands into the tank.
(Since I'm sure you're curious, those items on my tank lid are, from left to right, a turtle-shaped candle holder, pomade from Bumble & Bumble, and my favorite Burt's Bees hand salve.)
Fortunately, this was a pretty easy fix for a Saturday morning. I stopped at the local hardware store and bought a replacement chain for $1.49. At first the clerk insisted they weren't sold separately, but I don't take any guff when it comes to toilet parts. As if I wouldn't know they were sold separately...
I reattached the flapper to the flusher arm with the new chain, taking care to re-use the original foam floater ball to ensure a one-touch flush. Simple. Elegant. Effective.
And now my toilet (and my blog) are back in action. Stay tuned for more fixes because, as you all must surely realize, I can't outrun my destiny.